A 70-year-old man went to the doctor’s for a physical. The doctor ran some tests and said to the man，“Well，everything seems to be in top condition physically，but what about mentally？How is your connection with God？”
And the man answered，“Oh me and God？We have a really tight bond； he’s so good to me. Every night when I have to get up to go to the bathroom，he turns on the light for me，and then，when I leave，he turns it back off.”The doctor was astonished. He called the man’s wife and said，“I’d like to speak to you about your husband’s connection with God. He claims that every night when he needs to use the restroom，God turns on the light for him and turns it off for him again when he leaves. Is this true？”
And she said，“That idiot，he’s been peeing in the refrigerator！”
1.physical - 体检
2.tests - 检查
3.mentally - 精神上
4.bond - 联系
5.turns on the light - 打开灯
6.turns off - 关闭
7.astonished - 惊讶
8.claims - 声称
9.peeing in the refrigerator - 在冰箱里小便
上帝就在身边
一个70岁的老人到医生那儿进行体检。医生进行了多项检查后对老人说：“你身体的每项机能看起来都处于最佳状态，但是你的精神状态怎么样呢？你和上帝的关系如何？”
老人答道：“哦，我和上帝？我们关系密切，他对我非常好。每天晚上当我起床上厕所，他都替我开灯，然后，当我离开以后，他又为我把灯关上。”医生很惊讶。他叫来老人的妻子问道：“我想和你谈谈关于你丈夫和上帝关系的事。他声称每晚当他需要使用卫生间时，上帝都会为他开灯，而当他离开后，上帝又会替他把灯关上，这是真的吗？”
老人的妻子说：“那个白痴，他是把小便撒在冰箱里了！”