One sunny day a rabbit came out of her hole in the ground to enjoy the weather. The day was so nice that the rabbit became careless, so a fox sneaked up to her and caught her.
“I am going to eat you for lunch!” said the fox.
“Wait!” replied the rabbit, “You should at least wait a few days.”
“Oh, yeah? Why should I wait?”
“Well, I am just finishing my Ph.D. thesis.”
“Ha, that's a stupid excuse. What is the title of your thesis anyway?”
“I am writing my thesis on ‘The Superiority of Rabbits over Fox and Wolves. '”
“Are you crazy? I should eat you right now! Everybody knows that a fox will always win over a rabbit.”
“Not really, according to my research. If you like, you can come to my hole and read it for yourself. If you are not convinced, you can go ahead and have me for lunch.”
“You are really crazy!” But since the fox was curious and nothing to lose, he went with the rabbit into her hole. The fox never came back out.
A few days later, the rabbit was again taking a break from writing. A wolf came out of bushes and seized her.
“Wait!” yelled the rabbit, “You cannot eat me right now.”
“And why might that be, you fuzzy appetizer ?”
“I have almost finished writing my Ph.D. thesis on ‘The Superiority of Rabbits over Fox and Wolves'.”
The wolf laughed so hard that he almost lost his hold on the rabbit. “Maybe I shouldn't eat you, you really are sick in the head, you might have something contagious ,” the wolf said.
“Come and read for yourself, you can eat me after that if you disagree with my conclusion.” So the wolf went to the rabbit's hole and never came out.
The rabbit finished her thesis and was out celebrating in the lettuce fields.
Another rabbit came by and asked, “What's up? You seem to be very happy.”
“Yes, I have just finished my thesis.”
“Congratulations! What is it about?”
“It is titled ‘The Superiority of Rabbits over Fox and Wolves’.”
“Are you sure? That doesn't sound right.”
“Oh yes, you should come over and read it for yourself.”
So they went together to the rabbit's hole. As they went in, the friend saw a typical graduate student adobe , albeit a rather messy one after writing a thesis. The computer with the controversial dissertation was in one corner, on the right there was a pile of fox bones, on the left was a pile of wolf bones, and in the middle was a large, lip-licking lion, the thesis advisor.
一个晴天，一只兔子钻出地洞享受好天气。一不小心，有只狐狸溜过来，抓住了她。
“我要把你当午饭吃掉！”狐狸说。
“等等！”兔子说，“你还得等上几天。”
“哦？是吗？我为什么要等？”
“是这样，我的博士论文正在收尾。”
“哈，你这借口可够蠢的。那你说说，你的论文题目是什么？”
“我写的是《论兔子之于狐狸和狼的优越性》。”
“你疯了吗？我现在就该把你吃掉！谁都知道狐狸比兔子哪儿哪儿都强。”
“据我研究不见得如此。你愿意的话，可以来我洞里拿我的论文亲自读读看。看完还不信的话，你就直接把我当午饭吃了。”
“你是真疯了！”但是，狐狸好奇了起来，反正去看看也没什么损失，他就跟着兔子进了洞，之后再没有出来。
几天以后，兔子写累了，又出来休息。灌木丛里钻出来一只狼，把她抓住了。
“等等！”兔子喊道，“你现在不能吃我。”
“那是为什么呀，你这个毛茸茸的开胃菜？”
“我的博士论文就快写完了，题目是《论兔子之于狐狸和狼的优越性》。”
狼大笑起来，笑得差点就松开了兔子。“也许我是不该现在就把你吃掉，你真的是脑袋有病吧，这病会传染吗？”狼说。
“你自己进来读读看吧，不同意我得出的结论的话，再吃我也不迟。”于是，狼进了兔子洞，再也没有出来。
兔子写完了论文，出来到生菜地里庆祝。
另一只兔子走过来问：“这是怎么了？你这么开心。”
“是啊，我刚写完我的博士论文。”
“恭喜你！你写的是什么内容啊？”
“题目是《论兔子之于狐狸和狼的优越性》。”
“你确定吗？听上去不太对啊。”
“是吧，你过来自己读读看吧。”
于是，他们一起来到洞里，进去的时候，这位朋友看见的就是一个典型的研究生的窝。论文写完了，窝里也奇乱无比了。用来写那篇充满争议的论文的电脑放在一个角落里，右边是一堆狐狸骨头，左边是一堆狼骨头，中间站着一只体格硕大、正在舔嘴唇的狮子——兔子论文的导师。
-sneak [sniːk] v. 偷偷溜走
-appetizer [ˈæpɪtaɪzə(r)] n. 开胃品
-contagious [kənˈteɪdʒəs] adj. 有传染性的
-lettuce [ˈletɪs] n. 生菜
-adobe [əˈdəubɪ] n. 泥砖建筑物
-albeit [ˌɔːlˈbiːɪt] conj. 虽然；即使
“Ph.D.”是“Doctor of Philosophy”的简称，表示“学术型博士”，是全世界公认的学历架构中最高级的学衔。进行研究并撰写论文是修读博士学位的重要一环，此时，博士生可自称为博士候选人(Doctoral Candidate)，或在个人学术资格清单上写上“ABD”字样( All But Dissertation，准博士)，表示即将获得博士资历。