One day a man and a woman get in a car accident，and it’s completely the woman’s fault．The guy gets out of his car to talk to the woman．She gets out and says，“Since we’re both alive，it’s a sign from God that we’re meant to get married．”She’s very pretty，so the guy nods his head to agree with her．Then the woman takes out a bottle of wine and says，“Look，the wine bottle isn’t broken，so it is a sign from God that we have to drink it．”So she takes out the cork and hands the bottle to the man，who drinks half the bottle in a couple of gulps．Then he hands it to the woman，who puts the cork back in the bottle．The guy （slightly tipsy now） asks what she’s doing．“Waiting for the cops，”she says．
撞车事故
一天，一位男士和女士的车相撞，事故完全由女士造成。男士下了车想责备那位女士。那位女士也下了车，说：“我们都还活着，这是上帝在暗示让我们结婚。”因为女士非常漂亮，所以男士就点头同意了。只见她拿出一瓶葡萄酒说：“看，这瓶葡萄酒也没打碎，是上帝留给我们的喜酒。”于是她拔掉软木塞，把酒递给了男士，男士几大口就喝了半瓶。然后他把酒递回给女士，她重新把瓶塞盖到瓶子上。男士（现在有些微醉地）问她在干什么。“等交警来处理事故。”女士答道。
Car crash - 车祸、撞车事故
Accident - 事故
Fault - 过错、责任
Cork - 软木塞
Tipsy - 微醉的
Cops - 警察、交警（口语用法）